Why grandparents think their children are poor parents – Study

From the Daily Mail in the UK

Children are ill-disciplined, bad-mannered, disrespectful and treated too leniently – according to their grandparents. Changing attitudes mean most parents no longer reprimand their offspring with the age-old methods of a smack or sending them to bed without dinner because they fear upsetting them. But their grandparents believe this is to the detriment of the children’s manners and moral values, research has revealed. Instead of traditional punishments, modern parents tend to favour softer options, such as stopping their children from watching television or confiscating their mobile phones. As a result, two-thirds of grandparents believe their grandchildren are not as firmly disciplined as their own children were.

The publication quizzed 500 grandparents on the quality of their children’s parenting compared to their own.

….when asked about ways to improve how their grandchildren are brought up, one in four suggested harsher discipline and 27 per cent stressed the importance of better values. One in five believe children should have better manners and 19 per cent said they should have more respect for their elders….

When they were raising children, today’s grandparents were most likely to ground (49 per cent), smack (45 per cent) or send their children to their bedroom (49 per cent) as a punishment. When their children misbehaved they also faced receiving no pocket money (33 per cent), being sent to bed with no dinner (12 per cent) and having their ears boxed (seven per cent). But modern parents take a very different approach. Only 11 per cent of children are smacked if they misbehave, and only 21 per cent receive no pocket money as a punishment.

Ah – but remember the words of Cindy Kiro, former Children’s Commissioner who is far smarter than all our grandparents. She attempted to discredit the huge response to the two petitions asking for a Referendum on child abuse and the anti-smacking law by saying

        “..we know more about parenting and child health and development now than we did in our parents’, grandparents’ and great grandparents’ times..”

Why can’t our parents and grandparents be as smart as our Children’s Commissioners? 🙂

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2 comments for “Why grandparents think their children are poor parents – Study

  1. Massoud
    2 September 2011 at 4:23 pm

    The trouble with taking Grandparents and parents wisdom as gospel is that they were once young as well, and had elders who lamented their standards and changing world.

    Perhaps they bemoaned the 40 hour week, or women having electrical appliances, or children going to school all the time, or cars instead of horses. This was all going to lead to moral collapse no doubt.

    I’m not saying that Cindy Kiro is a fountain of wisdom, but neither are the opinions of parents or grandparents necessarily. After all, their wisdom gave us World War One, Two, nuclear bombs,the Great Depression, Elvis, etc, etc. And so on.

    One day some old “wise one” will be hectoring..”In my day we only had cellphones and Twitter and we behaved!”

  2. ann kingsbury
    14 September 2011 at 2:19 am

    More maybe known about child health and development, but with parents so often missing in the life of children today, ie, working, socializing, full of their own pursuits, children are not being taught how to socialize in a normal happy family atmosphere.
    And the ordinary man and woman in the street did not cause world war One, two or nuclear bombs, that was the greed and power seeking leadership in nations concerned.
    The value of the family unit has been destroyed,
    The value of the mother and father also negated, children left to make decisions for themselves that they are ill equipped to make, and the lack of love, leadership, and personal value and worthiness of each child is no longer taught from the parents, and creates fear in children, correct nurturing would
    would make the child a whole person, and not fragmented, and rebellious.

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